The Angels Weekly

Welcome back to another chapter in online dating.  This week we are talking about what you can do on a first date and some do’s and don’ts.

I had written a while back that when you meet someone online that you should be open to what they look like when you exchange photos and have reasonable expectations.  This is very important and when you meet them in person you should have a general idea of what to expect.  In my experience, the best approach in the first date is to dress more conservatively.  That means that the low cut top and push up bra should stay in your drawer for another time.  You want him to get to know you and not stare at your chest all night.  You can still dress in an attractive, sexy manner without letting it all hang out.  Dress according to the weather and where you are going of course, but keep it tasteful and make sure your clothes are clean and pressed.

Why do I say that?  On two occasions I had men come in dressed in dirty, wrinkled clothing.  I didn’t know what to do.  The first guy looked very nice in his picture but when I got there he was wearing a pair of ripped sweatpants and a flannel shirt that looked like it had been on his floor for a week.  His hair was not brushed and he looked like hell.  I reluctantly went in to have dinner – thank God it was just a chain restaurant, but I never called him again.  The next guy I met at a pub/restaurant and he was the same way.  Totally disheveled, shirt wrinkled and food stained.  This time I kept it brief and I left earlier than expected.  He never got a call again either.

You know, I wish I had done what my friend did.  She saw the way her date looked and she told him quite plainly ‘I am going home’ and she did.  My mother gave me a great hint on getting out of it if this happens to you and I am going to use it in the future.  If you see the guy is a disaster and you don’t want to meet him, go up to him and tell him that you had been trying to reach him by phone to tell him that something came up and you had to cancel and you didn’t want to just leave him standing there.  Then run, don’t walk back to your car and get out of there.  See how important first impressions are?

Another thing you should consider is what to talk about.  Don’t carry on about your ex.  I went on one date where all the guy did for two hours was tell me how he was divorced, how his wife cheated on him, how much he hated her and her child, what a pain the child was, etc.  After dinner and this conversation he asked if I wanted to go somewhere else to which I declined.  I had enough of the ex stories.  Regarding children, be mindful of your audience.  Another guy just carried on about his children and his grandchildren all night long and I never got to know him.  I don’t have children nor do I want any, which I told him, so the long stories and endless photos were uninteresting.  It would have been better if he just mentioned that he had kids and talked about it briefly.  I was polite about it but I wanted to learn more about him.  This really turned me off to dating guys with kids and I rarely do it now.  If you both have kids it would probably be alright because you have that in common.  I still suggest that you keep it brief and talk about other things too, that way you can get to know each other and share other interests.

As far as where to go, interesting places to go are easy to find.  You can always check out some local museums or check the newspaper, either online or one purchased at the store and review the local calendar pages. You can always go to www.wickedlocal.com and see what they have going on in your local area.  I have of course gone out to lunch and dinner and out to the movies but I do not recommend going to the movies on a first date because you are sitting there for two hours not talking.  Some more fun things would be to go mini golfing, to art museums, going shopping, going to festivals and or carnivals if they are in the area.  If you can do it, which I can’t, roller skating and bowling can be fun too.

Well that will end this chapter for now.  Next time we will talk about some things you should consider when talking with people online when you are dating and when it may be time to write them off completely and/or just keep them as a friend.

by: Mary Frances

Tags: children and dating, Dating, dressing accordingly, first impressions on a date, internet dating, love, love online, online dating

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